but, seriously...

ok, the realization has begun to really sink in: i have less than a month to get every piece of work that my first semester grades are based on, in to my profs. this translates into roughly 50+ pages of writing, filming/editing/putting up an interactive cooking website, and one more presentation. in the meantime, i am collaborating on a bunch of other things that are outside the scope of school marks, all of which are taking up considerable amounts of time. don't worry, i still manage to find time to waste watching reruns of friends, though. all is not lost.

so here i am: on the 4th floor of Stauffer library, trying to do research on how Foucauldian theory might link to modern day blogging...i'm feeling more than a little overwhelmed...and the secret's out - i'm terrible at coping with life when i feel overwhelmed. i stare out windows, and feel guilty of the time wasted; i feel further behind. i start to cry, but then realise that i don't have time to, and that's even more sad. i wish for hugs and warm blankets and my work to disappear...and i know that won't happen, and have some sort of inkling that somehow my character is in fact benefitting from all of the stress...but it doesn't make it any more pleasant, you know?

my break/tirade is over. i will go back to listening to The Kings of Convenience, and reading the Fibreculture Journal...here is a poem i wrote in 5 seconds, about 5 minutes ago.
hopefully i feel differently tomorrow.


it's coming down in thin, linear rivulets
out the window
the gravel and the pavement are wet
i wait for life
to stop escaping me
in the same manner.


The Pale Horse